


So it's not me

by LegendsofSnark



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Anal Fingering, But theres a reason, Established Relationship, M/M, Sexually inept
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-26
Updated: 2017-01-26
Packaged: 2018-09-20 02:05:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9470591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LegendsofSnark/pseuds/LegendsofSnark
Summary: Barry thinks the reason that Len doesn't want to sleep with him anymore is because he's grown tired of him.





	

It's not as though he's noticed. Because honestly he hasn't. Well okay he has but he's not going to say anything on the subject because it's not as though sex is the only thing on his mind. It's not. Truthfully, if Len told him that sex wasn't something he was into anymore he'd be happy to just abstain and get reacquainted with Mr. Right. But it's been one month, two weeks, eighteen days, twenty nine minutes and fifteen seconds---- sixteen seconds.   
  
Yeah, he's not counting at all.  
  
"It's okay Len. Honestly." Barry sighs and he watches as Len turns over, his back faces Barry and seconds later There's a faint snore. Len's out like a light and that leaves Barry alone with nothing but his mind and that throbbing sensation that's coursing through his body.   
  
                                          ••  
When he started this... Thing with Leonard Snart a year ago, things were perfectly perfect In their relationship. To say the least anyway. Of course most of the people in his life weren't thrilled with the fact that Barry Allen, a good kid , a marvelous and wondrous boy (people saw him as a goody two shoes and that wasn't him) would fall into bed with Leonard Snart,  Captain Cold. The man who menaced Central City until the flash stopped him on multiple times. The spur of the moment, that sensation that ran through Barry the last time that he had seen Snart.... Christmas Eve he believes (that night was a bit hazy in his mind after Len had left) but he does remember tracking the man down, screaming at him about breaking out and putting him in a tight spot and the next thing that he knows he's on his back and Start is giving him something  he hasn't had in a long time--- fulfilling and somewhat meaningful sex.  
  
And it didn't just end there that night. He didn't think that he would find something meaningful with a thief but he did and the sex was great until Len came back from being with the legends after stopping Vandal Savage. Something had changed with him and he didn't know what it was.   
  
Was he worried? Hell yeah  
  
Did he want to confront the man? Yes  
  
Did he have a sinking feeling that if he did Len would leave him? Of course   
  
But that night had set in motion much of what was going on with them and he might or might not need to speak with him about it, some day.   
  
Not today but some day.   
  
"Maybe he's cheating on you. Getting his fix somewhere else and doesn't need you anymore." Cisco had pointed out once and that nearly broke Barry's heart. But it was a jumpable conclusion. Len once called him his own little sex toy, could it be possible that he had grown tired of Barry and his stamina?   
  
Iris had quickly dismissed that notion in his head later that night. She wasn't Leonard Snart's biggest fan but as long as Barry was happy she was happy and she had a gut feeling that Leonard Snart would cheat. He didn't seem the type of person to do that.   
  
He had to have hope that she was right.   
  
                                          ••  
  
He finally thinks that maybe this could be the end of his dry spell (or Len's for that matter). It was August and Barry didn't get why most of his weather-powered metas didn't do any of their evil doing during summer or winter or spring break for that matter.   
  
Barry had just stopped a meta human, one who was similar in power to Mardon but could only create snow. ("Lame power but awesome name--- SnowMan!") Cisco had been a little too excited about that one and Barry could only snort. However, Len seemed to love the ice that came down on Central City and while it would take a while for it to clear up, Len seemed to be enjoying himself with it.   
  
"Come on Scarlet." Len goads. He's dressed in his parka. Barry hadn't seen it since Len returned and to see it now.... "Come enjoy the snow. We have a while before it's winter and I want to enjoy this." Len is in front of Barry, kneeling and with those puppy eyes Barry wants to drop the file he's going over and must have him right then and there. Barry tossed the file onto the floor, pulling Len onto his lap and grinning at the squeaking that the poor chair was receiving.   
  
"I need you." Barry sounds desperate but he doesn't care. Three months without so much a touch from Len seems like a lifetime and if he was cheating---- well Barry wanted to make sure that Len knew what he was missing out on. Barry deepens the kiss, his hands keeping Len against his body and he can feel Len softening into the kiss... He thinks maybe, maybe He does still find him attractive.   
  
Until---  
  
Len pulls away, jumping up quickly from Barry's lap. He's red in the face and his breathing is a bit heavy. Barry   
  
"Len." Barry gasps. Len doesn't seem upset but he seems to know something is off.   
  
"I just want to enjoy the show Scarlet. I'm not up for that today."   
  
Barry does his best to hide the hurt that's spreading through him.   
  
Not up for that today. He doesn't even say the words.   
  
"I would really like it if you join me."   
  
Barry doesn't say no. Instead he gets up, wills the erection down and joins Len outside.   
  
He has to figure out what's going on with him.  
  
                                            •••  
  
Len's sound asleep when Barry sneaks into bed. It's been a week since that day in the living room and he hasn't confronted Len about that nor has he mentioned anything regarding what's been going on with him. He wants to wake him up and yell at him but what good would that do? Len wouldn't be that fazed by it and it would be a lost cause on his part---- yet, what's the harm in asking? Right?   
  
Barry touches Len's arm, shaking the older man lightly and smiling when he notices that he doesn't stay sleep. Len has been known to be a notoriously light sleeper.  
  
"Yes Scarlet?" His voice is still laced with sleep, of course. "What can I do for you at--" he leans over and looks at the clock. "Three in the morning?"   
  
"Why won't you sleep with me? Did I do something wrong that made you not want to touch me or something? Because if I did, I had no intention of doing it." He rushes the words out and waits for Len's response. He waits to be yelled at, to be under a microscope, he waits for Len to tell him that he's completely correct and that he wants nothing more to do with him. He waits....  
  
Instead, however, Len sits up more and eyes Barry. He places a hand on Barry's shoulder and rubs small circles.   
  
"It's not you."   
  
And here's the breakup he's been expecting. He can't. His heart is speeding up, his instincts are telling him to run from the situation. He doesn't want to hear it. Not from Len.   
  
"It's... look. As you've noticed I'm not exactly young."   
  
Barry blinks. "What?"   
  
"Barry. I'm Forty-two. Not exactly young and not exactly old but I feel the effects none the less. And lately I've been, well... sexually inept. I spoke with Doctor Snow, much to her amusement about it and she says it's an effect of both the oculus and my age."   
  
Barry is slowly piecing the points together and it clicks in his mind. He let's out a strangled sound of words before he looks away.  
  
"You're..."   
  
Len nods. "Yes. I've been in a regime that she gave me but it doesn't seem to work. She always says to give it time. As much as I love you, I'm not doing this because I don't want to or don't care for you anymore. I'm doing this because I actually can't Scarlet."  
  
Barry feels like a fool. As if Len would ever cheat. He's a lot of things in the world but a cheat isn't one of them.   
  
"I'm sorry Len. For---"   
  
Len kisses him, shutting down whatever he was going to say next. He didn't need the explanations or the accusations. Len was a genius and could see the little gears spinning in Barry's mind about What was happening with him and what he thought was going on.   
  
"It's okay love. Honestly. I understand it. It's fine."   
  
                                           ••  
  
"Look at you," Len grins. He's hovering over Barry, leaving trails of kisses down his chest. Barry wasn't expecting this. Of all things he wasn't expecting for Len, on his forty-third birthday to be so... yeah. "I want to fuck you so bad." Barry breaths in sharply as Len trails a finger between his legs and brushes it against his hole, feeling himself clench around Len. He wasn't expecting this at all. The dinner with team Star Labs had just been that, a dinner until he felt a hand on his thigh and saw Len, who was already grateful that they were willing to throw him a birthday party and that must have done something to him. Next thing he knows Len is dragging him out of the West home.   
  
Len gently pushes the tip of his finger inside of Barry, deeper. Len grins up at him, his eyes are locked with Barry's, a telepathic bond connecting them. Barry can't handle the eye contact, he can't handle the way that his eyes are watching him closely and lets his eyes close as he enjoys this. It has been a while. His head hits back against the soft pillow. His breath hitches as he feels a second finger enter him. His mind racing with thoughts and memories and just of Len being here. Being with him. Len's  fingers curl inside him and he shakes, his entire body shakes and he doesn't want to vibrate. Not now. He knows that if he does then its over quickly for him and he wants to let this last.   
  
"Want another one Scarlet?" Len grins and it's a mocking, almost condescending tone and fuck, sometimes he hates this man. But he nods anyway.   
  
  
Len slides a third finger inside against the other two and Barry pulls him down for a deep, bruising kiss.   
  
"I forgot how this felt. How amazing you felt. It's going to be even better once I'm inside of you. Right?" Len whispers into Barry's ear. He  can hear the arousal in his voice. The want. "I want you so bad. Do you know that? I want you and I missed this so much."   
  
Barry holds him tighter. "I missed you too." And he doesn't mean to sound needy but it just comes out that way. He's always wanted this back after so long.   
  
"Do you want me as much as I want you?"   
  
"Yeah," Barry grunts. "—yeah."  
  
Barry watches as Len reaches for a condom, tearing the packet open easily with his teeth and slides it on. He's keeping his cool but Barry on the other hand is freaking out Inside. His entire body is racing with anticipation.  Len adds more lube over his cock, not that he would need it..  
  
Len smiles down at him as they lock eyes on more and he's guiding his cock inside of Barry with ease, he's careful as he does. He doesn't want to hurt the man. Barry feels him, every inch of him and he can't deal with the pleasure that it's bringing him, even the pulse of it as it stretches him. It doesn't burn as much as he remembers but it's only been a month so it shouldn't matter. He moves his hand down to his cock to distract himself from vibrating, wrapping his fingers around himself and stroking himself slowly. His head lulls to the side. He's watching the bare wall for no reason at all. His mind full of thoughts.   
  
"I love you so much Len." Barry moans.   
  
Even without the sex in his life, he realizes that maybe... no. He knows that without sex Len is the one for him. He could go forever without it, as long as he had the man he loved in his life. 


End file.
